Oh guys, I’ve really let myself down.
I’ve failed to effectively enforce my personal “write a blog by the end of every Sunday” deadline, and I’m sure you’re all extremely disappointed in me (especially you, Mum).
Naturally, I want to apologise; but it’s hard to be genuine when the reason I’ve been skipping blogs is because I’ve been bombing about all over the place. In the last two weeks I’ve been to Village Green Festival, performed in two improvised comedy shows, been on the radio, and of course; I’ve been drunk, drunk, drunkety drunk.
Oh, and I got a haircut and attended a Craig Charles DJ set (thanks for that one, Rachel).
Being busy isn’t the only reason I’ve failed to deliver such sterling (lol) original (lol) content in the last 14 days. Last Sunday, I woke up and frankly; I wanted to stay in bed, feasting on those vile 9p packs of curried noodles, and then go on a spontaneous road trip to Brighton to see my friend perform his stand up routine.
Sometimes, it’s okay to hit the pause button and steal a few hours of the day for nothing but staring at walls and slurping noodles.
As with everything in my life, these “few hours” had a soundtrack. It was mainly just this, on repeat. Have a listen and let it put you in a bitter sweet, sultry trance…
Finding the right words can be difficult, but when you finally form the perfect sentence; people take notice – especially on the internet. That’s what this week has taught me. I’ve also learned that there are only so many ways to say ‘I’m hung-over. HELP ME. Berrr’.
When I was younger, I was borderline mute in my shyness. I could talk fluently as a character on stage in the school play, but starting conversations with others used to be a full-on struggle. I couldn’t explain things properly unless they were written down, which is a shame – because few people at school had the time to sit and wait whilst I penned an essay about why purchasing Avril Lavigne‘s Let Go was the best musical decision I’d ever made. (That was in 2002. I had to sell my copy on eBay recently. Tough times).
Fortunately, I’ve grown out of this silent vocal habit, but I still thrive on paper; and that’s why I cherish any encouragement and kindness with regards to my writing. Caitlin Moran wrote in her novel How To Build A Girl: ‘Explaining why you love something is one of the most important jobs on Earth’ – and what better way to do that than on the page of a diary, the back of a notebook at work, or on the internet? Don’t settle for anything less than pure, golden enthusiasm and excitement when it comes to explaining why you ‘get’ something. Don’t hesitate when it comes to starting a conversation; whether it’s viral or in real life – it will be worth it.
Speaking of starting conversations: Trevor Nelson interviewed my friends and I at The Pink Toothbrush last night. Watch the results of the amazing/potentially life-ruining experience tomorrow night on The One Show (if we make the cut).
Also: look at this insane/incredible video from the flawless FKA Twigs. It’s definitely a conversation starter. I’ve been vogueing all over the place.
(Image courtesy of: http://uproxx.com/smokingsection/2015/08/fka-twigs-figure-8-new-song/)
I’ve had 10 hours sleep and I am hang-over free. I imagine that sentence was as boring for you to read as it was for me to type. I’d apologise – but being sober and stacked-up on sleep is precisely what I’ve needed.
I saw my youngest sister Sarah graduate on Tuesday at The Southbank Centre, and I completed my second week of working in lovely London. Unfortunately, I also got food-poisoning, which has resulted in much stress, further ill health, and sleepless nights. We can’t have everything, eh?
I should be in Brighton today with my friends celebrating Pride, but illness saw that plan cut brutally short on Saturday morning. I could use this blog to lament about these ultimately un-gnarly things, but I’ve been doing that all week to my Mum (hero).
Sometimes you have to sit down, calm down, and accept that life can simultaneously hurl diamonds and rocks at you. It’s okay to complain about the bruises left by the rocks; as long as you remain grateful for the stunning, sparkling clarity of the diamond moments too.
Speaking of being thankful, Alanis Morissette seems to understand the whole diamond/rock situation. I was 8 years old when I saw the video for ‘Thank U’. 17 years later, Morissette’s lyrics and bear-all attitude are still relevant. I might try the nudity thing on my next commute. Don’t think it’ll be as poetic as she makes it look though…
(Image courtesy of: http://giphy.com/gifs/television-rupauls-drag-race-thank-you-sBQRltrFwxqes)
(Gazelle Twin @ Electrowerkz, 22.4.15)
This blog will be brief for the following reasons:
1. I’m hung-over
2. I’m behind on assignments
3. I have to be somewhere later and it’s going to take a lot of will power/eyeliner to get me out of the house.
I just wanted to gloat about seeing Gazelle Twin at Electrowerkz on Wednesday night. It’s one of the most intense, interesting and inventive gigs I’ve ever been to. I’ve blogged about being a fan of Elizabeth Bernholz’s electronic creations before, but I wanted to re-fuel the fire and say how superb she was live. Favourite tracks included ‘I feel Blood’, ‘Human Touch’ and ‘Anti-body’. If you ever get the chance to see her, take it: it will blow your bobbed mind.
In a previous blog post I spoke about the trials and triumphs of pushing myself back in to performing on stage with The Laughter Academy. I have just performed in my third set of improvised showcases, and I want to share what this course in particular has taught me.
1. You can get through anything if you’re willing to laugh about it
Occasionally, I’d rather implode than discuss the things which make me want to punch holes in the sky screaming ‘I DEFY YOU, STARS!’ in a Romeo-esque rage (see gif below). The ‘things’ vary. I might be distraught watching the Snickers I paid 70p for get stuck during its fall to the bottom of the vending machine. I might be riddled with self-loathing about the decisions I’ve made whilst living by the mantra: ‘What would Courtney Love do?’
What stops me from having a Shakespearean-style breakdown? Laughter; genuine laughter, fake laughter, nervous laughter, evil laughter. The sound of a laugh – like the effortless sound of a human heart beat – is beautifully reassuring. Week after week, The Laughter Academy has kept my laughter levels at optimum capacity.
2. You can get away with anything if you do it with conviction.
I’ve been wearing the same Dr Martens for five years and the same pair of denim cut-off shorts for six. I consistently wedge in jokes about feminism and having a bob cut. I’m boring, yes, but I’m boring with conviction, and that’s what makes it okay!
If no-one laughs at the joke, that’s okay too; power through until the next punch line and don’t lose focus. This works in all situations; keep bloody going, regardless of how wearisome or embarrassing it might seem. The Laughter Academy has supported my comical outbursts and forced me to think outside of my bob-shaped box.
3. Time is precious – don’t take it for granted
Time flies: whether it’s the short time I’m on stage or the extra hour I stay behind in the pub after class. Lessons and showcases seem to last only moments, which is why they need to be cherished. I have made friends at The Laughter Academy who encourage me to pursue my ambitions. They won’t let me give up; even when I am convinced I should.
(Gif courtesy of: http://33.media.tumblr.com/4defd892aab30fd27d4e355ffe395d32/tumblr_n4el29Po661qj4315o1_500.gif)
Belle Jar bobbed along to London yesterday to see Gemma Arterton sing her feminist lungs out in Made in Dagenham. It was one heck of a sassy day. Juliette & I criticised the patriarchy hanging on the walls in The National Portrait Gallery, and afterwards we met Louisa for pizza, beer, and stories about WOW. I’ve woken up without a hang-over, and a desire to write a musical. I think I’m ‘growing up’.
Now, from one set of great women to another: back in 2013, HAIM released their debut album Days are Gone. I managed to completely overlook the album, even though friends had told me it was great, and my sister bought it for me at Christmas. Two weeks ago, I was rooting through my CD drawer, and there it was. I decided to give the HAIM girls one more chance. The CD’s not left the record player since. I’ve subsequently developed a deep love for Este, Danielle, and Alana.
I downloaded ‘Pray to God’, their collaboration with Calvin Harris, as a silent apology for ignoring their previous efforts. I’ve also been youtubing the living daylights out of them. At least 15 times this week, I’ve considered growing my hair long again, wearing my cut off shorts, and flying out to America to become their fourth member. I will be learning their dance routines, and recruiting my sisters in to a band too. I suggest you do the same.
(Image courtesy of: http://www.tumblr.com)
Happy International Women’s Day!
On this day last year, I contributed a small paragraph to Belle Jar for a collaborative article celebrating International Women’s Day. My contribution explained why Annie Lennox is one of my favourite women. On Friday 6th of March, almost a year later, I saw Annie speak at The Southbank Centre as part of the Women of the World Festival (WOW). I nearly cried. It was 9:30 in the morning, I was overwhelmed with lack of sleep and the realisation that I had seen one of my music/humanitarian icons in the flesh (I will blog/bore you about this in detail, over the next few days).
Today, I am returning to the WOW Festival for the third day in a row. I want to be more articulate, but right now I’ll settle for: ‘THIS HAS BEEN ONE OF THE BEST WEEKENDS OF MY LIFE AND TODAY IS GOING TO BE BRILLIANT!’ I have seen and heard some of the most inspiring and empowering stories, and no amount of blogging will justify their brilliance (but by ‘eck, am I going to try later on).
Also: I sank a delightfully dry bottle of white wine last night, and have lived to tell the tale headache free. This post, therefore, qualifies for the SUNDAY category.
(Image courtesy of groupthink.jezebel.com)